Got MarioKart Wii for the kids, and I've been playing it a little bit too... The game's obviously a sure-fire hit, and it's a lot of fun. But the game is not unlike a Vonnegut novel. You basically get punished for being in 1st place. If you've played these games before, you know there are items you can use to attack or hinder the other racers. If you're in 1st place, you basically get bananas (literally), and that's about it. If you're in last place, you get these thermo-nuclear turtle shells that automatically hunt down the front-runners and blow them up, or heat-seeking shells or POW blocks or lightning bolts. It's such bullshit. Just because I can steadily race and maintain the lead, I get my ass kicked so I drop back. Mario's a communist!!! It is a ton of fun if you're playing with other people though. The computer's just a jackass.

I've decided I'm not going to cook anymore at home. If I do, it's gonna be some processed, out-of-the-box bullshit. I made a spaghetti and meatball dinner last night, and everyone (my wife and kids) complained because I don't make it like my mother-in-law does. I make it the way MY mother does, who, by the way, is Italian, and is the illest cook I know, aside from my late grandfather, who she learned everything from (don't sweat my run-on sentence skills). My mother-in-law's way is cool and all, but I'm sorry, I refuse to make meatballs with OATMEAL. I use breadcrumbs. Oatmeal just seems wrong to me. And also, I add a little red wine to the sauce... I might as well have pissed in it with all the belly-aching my wife gives to me about that. I sat her down and showed her at least 5 basic sauce recipes online that call for red wine. Every time I make something, I'm always crucified for not making it like Nana does; and I consider myself a pretty decent cook. Whatever. I'm not cooking anymore, that's all. They can have their chef boyardee and Kraft bullshit. That's all they'll eat anyway. Their tastebuds must've been disabled at some point. Anything with spice, or flavor, they flip out about.

Bet you guys didn't see a rant about THAT coming, did you?

Peace.



- Joe

Sketchy at best...